I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
