Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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