I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
