i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
A bitchslap is in order.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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