I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
birth control should be required to get into college
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize
