Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
i out mim tonsoeep
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