So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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