who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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