Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
MIDGETS
????
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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