you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
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