Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Are we still banned from the library?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Randomize
