Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
