She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
