Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
