yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
