I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize