She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
