some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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