pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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