wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
