i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
