You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize