2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize