TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize