god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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