I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Buhtt sex?
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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