i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize