thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
