break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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