did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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