I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
