I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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