Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
