Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
