She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Randomize
