In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
