Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
