so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
