We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
