we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Princesses don't give blow jobs
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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