dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
