Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
