No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
