I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
