i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize