They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
