You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
