id be glad to
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Randomize
