he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
