Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
