GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
