I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
